Contents
=> “The Three Pigs of Dallas, Texas” - text and activity
=> What’s Happening
=> In the Next Issue

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“The Three Pigs of Dallas, Texas”
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Here’s a new False Fairy Tale. Perhaps you remember how these work: students read the text, and for each number (1, 2, 3 etc), you ask them if that is how they remember the story.

For example, a student reads the first sentence as it is written: “1. Once upon a time in the city of Dallas, there lived three pigs.”

The teacher asks if that is how the student remembers the story.

The student replies, “They didn’t live in Dallas. They lived in the forest somewhere.” And so on.

<>A NO-MATERIAL VERSION OF THE ACTIVITY:

I’ve made the text quite short, so that–in the great tradition of “ETs in Russia & Elsewhere”–teachers don’t need to make handouts.

Here are 4 simple ways to present the text:

1. Write the text on the board before class
2. Dictate the text to students during class.
3. Combine the above two methods.
4. Print 1 copy of the story, cut it into ten pieces, and ask ten students to each write one sentence on the board.

<> Note: Fairy tales in English traditionally end “…and they lived happily ever after.”

The Three Pigs of Dallas, Texas

1. Once upon a time in the city of Dallas, there lived three pigs.

2. The first pig built a house out of chocolate because he had a sweet tooth.

3. The second pig built his home out of aluminum because he was cheap and didn’t want to pay more.

4. The third pig built his home out of titanium because he was paranoid that a farmer would come and eat him.

5. One night a Fat Farmer, who loved to eat pigs, came to the first pig’s house, and said, “Let me in, or I’ll eat your house of chocolate, and make a meal out of you!”

6. And that is just what he did. The fat farmer ate the house and the first little pig.

7. Then the farmer came to the house of aluminum. He said, “I’ll knock down your house and make bacon out of you.”

8. So he did. He made bacon out of the second pig.

9. Then the farmer came to the house of titanium. He couldn’t
knock it down.

10. Oh well, he thought, he had already eaten two pigs. So he went back to his wife in Dallas, and they lived fatly ever after.

Follow-up Activities

1. LANGUAGE PATTERN: “made [out] of …” Questions for writing or speaking:

What’s your favorite soup made of?
What are your clothes made out of?
What are your shoes made of?
What is your coat made of?
What is a good friendship made of?

2. MORAL: Ask your students to write a moral to the story.
(All morals are acceptable, no matter how silly).Here is Mr. Poosheesty’s moral: “If you are a pig you probably SHOULD be paranoid because people just want to eat you.”

3. Ask students to WRITE their own False Fairy Tale based on a well-known fairy tale. Perhaps even ask groups to perform the fairy tale in front of the class. (This will of course require a lot of time, so plan accordingly).

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What’s Happening
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After a brief summer hiatus, “English Teachers in Russia” will be returning to its twice-monthly format. Hurray! Next issue: August 6th.

Kevin was studying Russian in Indiana from June 19-July 19. His excellent and inspiring teacher was Galina Lovtsevich from Vladivostok.

Kevin learned what it was like to be a language student once again—instead of a teacher. “It’s different,” he writes. “The desks are smaller.”

Mr. Poosheesty, meanwhile, went to the West African island of Sao Tome to teach Business English to oil workers. He had a pet monkey
named Cyrus, whom he trained to fetch beer from the local store. Although Cyrus neglected on occasion to pay for the beer, this was not the reason for Mr. P’s deportation. Mr. P swears it was just a minor visa problem, and–
despite what was written in the local papers–has nothing to do either with Cyrus or the governor’s daughter.

Mr. P is back in California. He misses Cyrus. The two still write letters to each other.

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In the next issue (@Aug 7th, 2003)
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Fun Facts about the English Language

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Copyright 2003 Kevin McCaughey & I.M. Poosheesty
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